“Life is all about action and words. Besides action, we only have words. So-called social skills are half about talking.”
When you say things beautifully, the listener feels good, and the speaker feels good too.
In a world full of thorns and prickles, learning to talk properly is not just about knowing how to navigate life, it’s the cheapest social investment you can make.
Think Before You Speak, Care About How Others Feel
The best way to talk is to pause for three seconds before you open your mouth.
Because in this world, there are not only sharp objects that can hurt you, but also hurtful words.
Brainless chatter can easily hurt a friend’s feelings.
Giving someone words is more valuable than jewels; hurting someone with words is more powerful than weapons.
Speaking without thinking, hitting people right in the heart, isn’t being genuine, it means you’re not smart enough, you’re not well-mannered enough.
You need to know that being straightforward should be based on mutual respect, not just letting your own personality run wild.
Ignoring other people’s feelings and blurting out whatever comes to mind isn’t being straightforward, it’s being selfish. Smart people think before they speak, they pause for three seconds before they say anything.
Physical wounds will heal over time, but verbal wounds hit your soul and never fully heal.
So, control your unruly mouth, and you’ll be a breath of fresh air in every relationship.
See Through It, But Don’t Say Anything, Remember to Know Your Place
Sometimes we see right through the inappropriate things people do and say.
But to avoid creating cracks in the relationship, we need to be clever when we point out someone’s mistakes.
A couple, every month, gives their parents living expenses. One day, the husband discovered that his wife gives her parents $500 a month, but her in-laws get $1000 a month.
Knowing the truth, he didn’t want to ruin their relationship because of this, but he wasn’t happy with the situation continuing.
When he saw their two kids playing in the living room, he had an idea.
His daughter is a few years older than his son. Before, every day after work, he would always pick up his son first, and spend some time with him, before he spent time with his daughter.
Now, after work, no matter how much his son tries to get his attention, he ignores him and just plays with his daughter. His son feels wronged and cries.
His wife couldn’t stand it anymore and said, “Your son is still young, can you hold him first?”
He calmly answered, “The $500 one, you can go ahead and comfort her. I’m going to comfort the $1000 one.”
His wife instantly understood why her husband was acting so strange, her face flushed, and from then on, she sent $1000 to both sets of parents.
As the proverb says: “You don’t need to explain to a smart person, you don’t need to hit a loud drum hard.”
In life, sometimes when someone makes a mistake, we just need to subtly touch on the edge of the issue when we remind them.
Don’t delve into the details, just mention it and stop. This will allow the other person to accept your opinion more quickly, and make communication smoother.
Don’t directly expose them, it saves face for them, and you get their approval, and things become simpler.
See through it, but don’t say anything, don’t embarrass others, don’t cause trouble for yourself.
Being sensitive to things and careful with words is a kindness to others, and it also makes you look good.
Don’t Talk Deeply When You Don’t Know Someone Well, Only Say Three Parts and Keep Seven Parts to Yourself
Don’t overestimate people, don’t underestimate human nature.
In life, there are some so-called best friends and brothers, don’t think that because you’re close friends, you should completely devote yourself and trust them. Not everyone deserves your true heart.
As the saying goes: “When you meet someone, say three parts of what you have to say, don’t completely reveal your whole heart.”
Even the closest friends should be kept at arm’s length. Don’t let the weaknesses revealed in your words become gossip for others, or a weapon to threaten you.
The world is fickle, people change easily, you shouldn’t wish to harm others, but you should be careful.
Saying three parts, protects yourself, and also protects others.
Be a Good Listener, Make Each Other Feel Comfortable
At parties, some people are always glib, they bring their own topics, and they liven up the atmosphere. And those who aren’t good at communicating with people in public, can only hide in corners, casting envious glances at them.
But being good at talking isn’t just about being articulate and being able to talk endlessly. Listening attentively is also a successful way to communicate.
The Buddha, who is worshipped by many, has big ears and a small mouth. He understood that listening is more important than speaking.
High-level communication isn’t just about focusing on what you should say next, it’s about paying attention to how others want to say things.
“The best way to be clever is not to talk about yourself, but to listen to others talk about themselves.”
When you can’t be a good conversational leader, try to be a patient listener.
Listen to others pour out their hearts, understand their emotions, deepen your mutual understanding, and you’ll be more likely to resonate with them on a spiritual level.
Be like the ocean, hold everything and remain calm. Those who are good listeners are usually more popular.
Wise men say: “There is a skill in the world that can make people quickly accomplish great things and gain recognition from the world, and that is the ability to speak in a way that makes people happy.”
Whether you’re good-looking or not isn’t the deciding factor in life, whether you’re likeable or not when you talk is even more important.
If you can talk well, even a few words can reach people’s ears and hearts, touch their hearts, and move their souls.
If you can’t talk well, even if you’re witty, you’ll only get half the results and make people dislike you.
Be someone who can talk well, listen more, watch more, think before you speak, don’t pick on others, don’t expose their weaknesses.
Use clever language to withstand the storms of life; use vivid words to depict the beauty within life.