In this rapidly developing era, everything seems to be fast-paced. Most people are rushing on the road, wanting to sprint to their destination. But life is long, and you can’t rush it. Slow down, and we can enjoy the beautiful scenery along the way and feel the beauty of life.
Zhao, who works in the office of a certain company, once frankly said, “I like relationships that move a little slower.” At home, I’ll eat, chat, and go for walks with my family. We go on trips together, and we are all so happy and joyful. At work, I like to listen carefully, explain patiently, and communicate easily with my colleagues. This feeling is very comfortable. In my free time, I get together with my friends, and we chat, go shopping, and watch movies together. We enjoy the happy times we have together.
On the road of life, many people have chosen to run fast when faced with the choice between fast and slow, especially young people. I think it’s better to slow down.
Slow Down With Your Family, and We Can Fully Enjoy the Warmth and Happiness of Home
Zhao is 50 years old this year. Her son and daughter-in-law work out of town, and they can only get together during long holidays. Usually, she and her husband are the only ones at home. After work, they buy groceries, cook, take a walk, chat, and watch TV together. Every weekend, they carry big bags of fruit, vegetables, and daily necessities to visit their parents and spend time cooking, eating, and chatting with them. Both families live in nearby neighborhoods. Zhao said that they bought the house nearby so that it would be easier to take care of their parents.
When family members are together, including parents, siblings, and brothers and sisters, there are not many demands of each other. It’s more about caring and companionship. This is something I feel most deeply. My mother-in-law has lived alone for 20 years. Although she’s used to it, she’s always very happy when I go to see her every weekend. She has so much to tell me. After lunch, we can chat for the whole afternoon. When I leave, she walks me a long way and always reminds me not to buy anything when I come next week.
My parents died early. During holidays, my brother and sister-in-law always call us to come home. Every time I go back, my sister-in-law prepares a lot of food, sometimes including the children. There are 20 or 30 people in the family, two large tables, and everyone eats, drinks, plays cards, chats, and watches TV together. It’s very lively. My brother said, “I just hope that the family can get together often. It doesn’t matter if the food is good or bad, as long as everyone is happy. That’s the greatest happiness.”
Actually, it’s not just people from our generation who are nostalgic for family and love. In recent years, more and more people born in the 1980s and 1990s, after working and struggling in other places, have become “more mature.” They are starting to shift their focus to their families. Especially during the New Year, many people from other places drag their heavy luggage on their way home, regardless of the distance, cold weather, or traffic jams. They have also begun to care about “family affection” in their own way.
And you’ll find that most of them spend the New Year with their families.
A friend said, “When we were young, we always thought that a red envelope, a big meal, and some fireworks were the meaning of the New Year. But as we get older, we see that the white hair on our parents’ heads is getting more and more, and we realize that we haven’t spent enough time with them. Then we suddenly realize that spending time with them is the greatest meaning of the New Year.”
Slow Down With Your Colleagues: Treat Each Other Sincerely, Communicate Well, Get to Know Each Other Deeply, and Strengthen Relationships
Society is developing rapidly, and people’s pursuits are becoming fast-paced. They want to get promoted quickly, get a raise quickly, quickly integrate into a circle, a group, quickly become good friends. However, some things can’t be rushed. You might seem to have integrated into the group in a short period of time, but it’s just an illusion, and it can’t stand the test of time.
Before, because of the epidemic, many people celebrated the New Year in place. Little Horse and his family of four couldn’t go back to their hometown in Hebei for the New Year, so they spent the New Year with my old couple at my house.
During that time, Little Horse told me about the college student, Feng Tao, who had been assigned to the company two years ago and was going to resign and go home. I asked why, and he said that Feng Tao couldn’t do anything well and loved to spread gossip. Now, no one in the lab likes him.
Feng Tao was a college student who majored in experiments. He was recruited by the company in 2017. At that time, they recruited one boy and one girl. After pre-job training, they were assigned to Little Horse’s lab for an internship. The boy’s name was Feng Tao. He was outgoing and a familiar face. He was very sweet-talking and called everyone “Brother Ma,” “Brother Wang,” and “Sister Zhang,” seemingly very likable. He quickly became “familiar” with everyone.
The girl, Wang Juan, was different. She arrived at the company early every day, cleaned the office, filled two kettles with hot water, and then started reading. When other colleagues arrived, she would smile and greet each teacher, and then go about her business. The old colleagues would politely respond but didn’t communicate much more.
However, after a while, people’s impressions of the two children changed. People gradually discovered that Feng Tao was not practical, liked to play smart, and most importantly, had a habit of gossiping.
The two apprentices were taught by the same teacher. Wang Juan could already independently conduct some simple chemical experiments under the guidance of her teacher, and her experimental reports were also good. She was always following behind the teacher, going to the site, collecting experimental samples, and analyzing data. If she didn’t understand something, she would ask the teacher, and the teacher was willing to teach her. But Feng Tao didn’t like to study, and he didn’t ask questions if he didn’t understand.
More than two years later, Wang Juan had become the deputy leader of a certain experimental project, while Feng Tao was still doing simple experiments and screening experimental materials. He couldn’t even analyze data or write experimental reports.
At the end of the year assessment, everyone gave Wang Juan an excellent rating, while Feng Tao’s overall score barely passed.
Let’s talk about Little Horse and Little Lily. They were college students who were assigned to our company 10 years ago. Little Horse is now the lab director. Little Lily is Little Horse’s wife. They were both college students who were assigned to the company. After pre-job training, Little Lily interned with me in the office for a while, then was assigned to the grassroots level. Now she is also a department head.
Both children are very diligent, humble learners, have solid work, and high technical skills. The company leaders and colleagues all recognize them. Our relationship has always been very good.
They would tell me about any problems they have at work, in their relationship, etc. I became their confidant and psychological counselor, as well as their parent. After they got married, they often came to my house for dinner and chat. We are colleagues, friends, and family.
The two examples above tell newcomers to the workplace: when you first arrive in a strange environment and a strange group, you need to adapt to the environment and get to know everyone here as soon as possible.
Humbly learn from your seniors, delve deep, constantly improve your work ability and professional skills, learn to communicate well, and treat everyone around you sincerely. You will find that you have unknowingly integrated into this group, and the people here have begun to accept you.
Over time, you will go from colleagues to friends, and then develop into good friends.
Zhao is particularly good at handling relationships with colleagues. According to her colleagues, Zhao may be quick-witted and efficient in her work, but she is always patient when explaining work to them. She is calm and composed, and her speaking speed is always slow. She explains every technical detail in the construction process clearly.
Not only that, she will unreservedly teach everyone any technical questions they have. When colleagues report work or raise problems, she will listen carefully and then give her own suggestions.
She also said, “In the workplace, colleagues should treat each other sincerely, help each other, and progress together. When communicating with colleagues, I will slow down and try to express what I want to say clearly. I also like to listen carefully, explain patiently, and communicate easily. This way of getting along makes me feel comfortable.”
Communication is very important for everyone. In human interaction, we must have a sincere attitude, so that we can have good communication with others.
People open their hearts and communicate with others with their most sincere side. This is very important. The same applies to friends.
Slow Down With Your Friends, and We Can Relax and Enjoy Our Time Together
In the vast sea of people, they met, got to know each other, and came together. They became friends. We will meet many friends on the road of life. We will also lose many along the way. The ones who remain are our true friends. So what are true friends?
The ones who reach out to help you when you need it; the ones who share your hobbies, work together for the same ideals, and fight side by side with you; the ones who dare to point out your mistakes and help you correct them;
The ones who may not see each other often, but who are just a phone call away; the ones who are sincere to you and fully trust you; the ones who were classmates and still keep in touch. They are the friends who deserve our lifelong cherishing.
When we slow down with our friends, we can go shopping, chat, and travel together. Now, many middle-aged and elderly friends like to get together with three or five friends in their spare time to go on trips nearby or go shopping and watch movies together.
I like it when we slow down with our friends. We can relax, open our hearts, speak freely, and reminisce about our past adventures. As we get older, we increasingly want to get together with our old classmates and friends more often. We drink tea, chat, and enjoy this relaxed and pleasant time.
Classmate reunions are not just about eating, drinking, and having fun. They require careful planning and organization because it’s a kind of emotion, an emotion that needs to be maintained. Life doesn’t have many 10 years, 20 years, 30 years… It’s rare to see each other, so each time is worth cherishing! Classmate reunions ultimately leave precious and beautiful memories for everyone… When we reminisce, there is only emotion and hope, no regrets.
I remember one day in August 2020, Fen, a childhood playmate who was in the same class from elementary school to high school, called me. She said she wanted to invite a few classmates to her house for tea and asked when I was free so she could make arrangements in advance. Because I live the farthest away from them, even though we’re all in the same city, we don’t see each other often. We only meet when someone in the family has something going on.
I try to attend every classmate reunion unless there are special circumstances. That reunion was scheduled for noon on a weekend. I left at 7 am and still arrived last. It was already past 11 am when I got there. My classmates arrived one after another before 10 am. The 12 of us talked and laughed nonstop from 10 am to 5 pm. No one wanted to leave.
At our age, the ideals and aspirations we once cherished are no longer so important. It’s more important than anything to live healthy.
Finally, at my suggestion, we reluctantly ended the reunion. The classmates said goodbye to each other, “Live well.” And went home.