How should you live your best life when you reach middle age?
One answer is:Let go, don’t dwell, don’t look back.
By middle age, life is halfway over. Memories fade like smoke, leaving only the path ahead and the future to make you feel grounded.
By middle age, you’ve seen half a lifetime of dust and grime. The past is just a prologue. Only the flowers in front of you and the person next to you bring you peace.
All the gains and losses, right and wrong, regrets, they no longer matter. Only by letting go of everything and learning to turn the page can you go further and more confidently on the road ahead.
Let Go of Gains and Losses, and You’ll Find New Life
Some say: Life is like that, half gain, half loss, half glory, half decline. Life is a vast ocean. There are times when you’re riding high, and times when you’re tasting the bitterness of life.
But whether good or bad, past gains and losses shouldn’t become stumbling blocks on your path forward. There’s a well-known guesthouse owner in the area. When he was younger, he ran a breakfast stand, sold fruit, and even opened a restaurant.
He made money, he lost money, he met good people, he was cheated. He accumulated a lifetime of business experience. A few years ago, he opened a guesthouse in the local old town. But then the pandemic hit, and it wiped out all his money.
He lost his life savings. You’d think he would be heartbroken, sleepless. But a while back, I saw him sharing his new life on a short video platform.
In the video, he’s smiling and singing on a country road, in a lush vegetable garden, by a smoky stove. He’s full of smiles and spring, relaxed and carefree.
You have to admire this guesthouse owner. He’s experienced ups and downs, yet he can still let go of gains and losses and enjoy the happiness of life.
A rich man carried a sack of treasure searching for happiness, but after traveling thousands of miles, he never felt happy.
One day, he met a farmer carrying a bundle of firewood, and asked him: “You’re carrying such heavy firewood, are you happy?” The farmer put down the heavy firewood, wiped the sweat from his brow and replied: “Happiness is simple, letting go is happiness!”
In life, how many people become “rich men,” remembering their past glory, then looking at their current predicament, and unable to find peace. They live in the past, in their gains and losses, and lose the happiness of the present, letting their anxieties cloud their hearts.
Gains and losses are part of life, don’t be resentful.
When you reach middle age, every step you take is a precious treasure and a reflection of your experience in the world. Only by letting go of past gains and losses can you harvest the beauty of having seen it all, experienced it all.
Don’t be shackled by the past, smile calmly in the face of it, and you can truly begin the journey of the second half of your life.
Don’t Dwell on Small Matters, and You’ll Find Happiness
I once heard a story about a middle-aged man with a disability in his right hand. The man worked in a factory. One morning, he woke up to find his briefcase had been thrown on the floor by his son and was dirty.
His wife was right there, and didn’t bother to clean it up. He was furious, and beat his son, then cursed his wife, and finally they started arguing. By the time they were done arguing, it was very late. He didn’t have time to eat, and rushed to work.
On the way, he ran into traffic, and ended up being late by a few minutes, which cost him a month’s perfect attendance bonus. At work, he was distracted, still thinking about what happened that morning, and he got angrier and angrier.
He didn’t notice that the machine was slowly approaching his right hand. With a scream, his three fingers were cut off by the machine, leaving him permanently disabled.
Originally, the briefcase being dirtied by his child was a small matter, something that could be fixed by wiping it clean. But because he kept dwelling on it, it turned into an irreversible tragedy. There’s an old saying: Don’t cry over spilled milk.
If the milk is spilled, it’s no use crying over it. If you encounter a bad person or a bad situation, no matter how much you dwell on it, you’re the one who gets hurt. In the past, there was a rich merchant who was shopping at the market with his pregnant wife.
Suddenly, a young man brushed past him. The merchant glanced at the young man, then turned to his servant and said: “The money’s gone, let’s go home and get the silver.”
The servant was puzzled, and asked: “Master, didn’t you bring silver when we left? Why do we have to go back and get it now?” The merchant replied: “The silver was just stolen by that young man.”
The servant heard this, and immediately went to chase after him, but was stopped by the merchant.
The servant was puzzled by his master’s behavior: “Master, your silver has been stolen, how can you let him go?”
The merchant said: “Look at this man, his expression is fierce, and he’s carrying a weapon in his pocket. If I fight with him, he’s bound to hurt me. Besides, I have my pregnant wife, it’s better not to fight with him. The silver is gone, but if I lose my life, that would be a big deal.”
The servant listened, and repeatedly praised the merchant’s words.
Life needs the wisdom to not dwell, not to compete.
When you reach middle age, every day you wake up, you face the troubles of food and drink, and the pressure of work and life. Every now and then, you encounter some unscrupulous people. These trivial matters and vile people can sometimes make you feel anxious and suffocated.
But if you keep dwelling on small matters and vile people, you’re the one who gets hurt. Ups and downs are common in life, the good and bad of life are always coming at you. Learn to not dwell, not to compete, in the face of small matters and vile people,
and you’ll be able to make peace with life and feel true happiness.
Don’t Look Back at Regrets, and You’ll Be More Confident
When you reach middle age, don’t look back.
By middle age, whose life isn’t filled with regrets? The things you wanted to do but didn’t, the people you wanted to see but didn’t,
may have become a bit of sorrow in your heart in middle age.
But regrets are always in the past, and anxieties should become like clouds, and you can more confidently live the second half of your life.
Lily used to be an opera singer. When she was young, she studied the basics with her master. While everyone else was sleeping, she was pulled up by her master to practice early in the morning.
She had been loved by many audiences at small performance venues, so her master decided to give her a bigger stage and recommended her to a TV station. It’s not easy to promote opera on TV, and Lily cherished this opportunity, practicing day after day.
But on the day before the show was recorded, Lily fell into a ditch while riding a motorcycle,
breaking half of her body. She missed the opportunity.
After a year in bed, Lily was back in action, performing in small venues, and her master wanted to give her another chance to go on TV. But on New Year’s Eve, while setting off fireworks, Lily was accidentally injured by the explosion and hospitalized again.
After half a year of recuperation, Lily was discharged from the hospital and continued to perform opera in various small performance venues. On stage, she’s masterful, graceful, and even though she’s not on a big stage, it doesn’t stop her from spreading the charm of opera.
She said: “Maybe I’m not destined for great fame, but being able to do what I love for a lifetime, safe and sound, is already the greatest fortune.”
In Lily’s eyes, her past regrets are no longer worth mentioning. Now she loves this small stage that allows her to showcase herself. I once heard a saying: The happiest person in the world is the one who doesn’t have to be responsible to anyone else,
and the second happiest person is the one who never looks back. For the rest of your life, don’t look back at regrets, only those who look forward and sail with the wind will be more confident.
When you clench your fists, there’s nothing inside; when you open your hands, the world is in your hands.
When you reach middle age, you’ve seen all the glitz and glamour, tasted the warmth and coldness of the world, and experienced the impermanence of life. It’s time to open your hands and embrace a new future. Let go of past gains and losses, don’t dwell on the trivialities of life, don’t look back at regrets.
Believe that as long as you take light steps, no matter where you are, you can encounter the most beautiful scenery.