Many people think of “middle age” as the hardest and most difficult part of life, full of anxiety and helplessness.
Life pressures definitely bring many challenges for middle-aged people: they need to support aging parents and raise young children.
Their dreams are shelved, and they can’t afford to “lie flat” or stop moving forward. They must push forward with all their might. I once saw a saying: The biggest crisis for middle-aged people comes from their own state.
As you reach middle age, there’s a lot of sadness and helplessness, but only by making peace with yourself and breaking through the crisis can you withstand life’s storms and live a wonderful life.
Staying active, managing your emotions, and not being hard on yourself are the best ways to avoid the midlife crisis.
Stay Active
The thing middle-aged people fear most is getting sick. A healthy body is the foundation for middle-aged people to keep moving forward.
Bai Yansong once shared how he improved his health through exercise. For a while, he often felt dizzy. He went to the hospital for a checkup, and the doctor told him his blood pressure was dangerously high.
He didn’t want to rely entirely on medication, so when the doctor told him he needed to take medication to control it, he asked, “Do I have to keep taking it?”
After getting a positive answer, Bai Yansong said, “Give me two months. I’ll adjust myself. If it doesn’t work, I’ll take the medicine.” He started walking briskly for an hour every night, and then gradually transitioned to running.
After a period of exercise, not only was his blood pressure under control, but his other health indicators improved, and he became a fitness ambassador. There’s a saying: People who know how to manage their bodies can manage their lives.
The various troubles in work and life are enough to push many middle-aged people to the brink of collapse. It’s during these times that you need a healthy body to support you so you can continue to do what you want.
Health needs investment. Exercise should be like eating—something you should keep doing for your whole life!
Stillness is death. Only movement can open the door to eternal life.
Life is not over, and neither is exercise. Stay active, and your body will be healthier.
A healthy middle-aged person is a family’s greatest blessing. Staying active is one way to solve the midlife health crisis.
Emotional Stability
Someone said, “Emotions are like a gun. When we pull the trigger of our emotions, the barrel is actually pointed at ourselves.”
A middle-aged person who can’t control their emotions will only make their life more chaotic. John Will was constantly frustrated by his daughter’s rebellious behavior.
One time, he saw a boy kissing his daughter. He was furious and wanted to go and teach the boy a lesson. His wife told him to calm down and understand the situation before making a decision.
So he calmed himself down and talked to his daughter. It turned out she was just trying to get his attention.
Imagine if John Will hadn’t calmed down and had gone to deal with the situation in a fit of anger. He would have damaged his image as a father and also hurt someone else. There’s a saying:
“In the world of adults, you should have already quit emotions.” A middle-aged person who can’t manage their emotions will find it hard to straighten out their life.
It’s better to think things over than to act rashly. It’s better to be calm than to be emotional.
In middle age, you’re relying on your ability to heal yourself. Letting your emotions loose will only make you lose your composure, misjudge situations, and lose your way. In middle age, maintaining emotional stability allows you to deal with complex matters calmly and wisely, without letting your mind become cluttered.
Brand management expert Leonard was under a lot of pressure at work when he first started his business. He had to attend meetings, choose products, and go to all kinds of social events. When he was busy working, he didn’t even have time to drink water. The long working hours would also cause him to feel anxious.
But every time, he would calm down his negative emotions in his car before going home and smiling at his family. He always believed, “Home is a haven of love and warmth, not a garbage can for stress and emotions.”
Middle-aged people who can manage their emotions make their lives full of sweetness and happiness. They can navigate life with ease and face life’s ups and downs with calmness and composure.
The weak let their thoughts control their actions, while the strong let their actions control their emotions.
Middle-aged people need to be tough enough to handle hardship, but they also need to know how to manage their emotions.
Emotional Stability, Fewer Worries, More Joy, and a More Peaceful Middle Age
Don’t Be Hard on Yourself
Self-aware people know not to be hard on themselves. In middle age, you need to be able to let go of things, not be stubborn, and then you’ll live a more comfortable and enjoyable life. There’s a fable:
A middle-aged man was surrounded by worries. He felt dissatisfied with everything, and he searched everywhere for a way to get rid of his worries. He came to a river and saw an old man sitting under a willow tree fishing. The old man was holding a fishing rod and looked carefree.
The middle-aged man went up to him and bowed. He asked, “Old man, can you teach me the secret to getting rid of my worries?” The old man smiled slightly and asked, “Who is tying you up?” “… No one.”
“If no one is tying you up, why do you talk about getting rid of it?” The middle-aged man was suddenly enlightened. He realized that many of life’s worries are caused by being hard on ourselves, and it’s our own thoughts that trap us.
When you’re faced with various worries and indecision, it’s wise to not dwell on it and not worry too much. Don’t let unnecessary worries hold you back.
Similarly, my friend Kent recently got into a fight with herself over something, and she was anxious all night. She couldn’t sleep well at night, and she had no energy during the day. A while ago, their department was going to promote a deputy director.
Kent thought that she was the best candidate in the department, whether in terms of education or performance. She also had a good relationship with her superiors.
But the results announced were that a colleague who was a few years younger than her was promoted. Since then, Kent’s confidence has been shattered. She started to doubt herself and became listless.
Her colleagues advised her not to give up easily, to find the root of the problem, and that if all else failed, she could try again next year. Her family also comforted her, saying that the workplace is like a battlefield, and when you encounter failure, you should learn from it and keep trying.
The encouragement from the people around her made Kent realize that only by making peace with herself and letting go of the past can she look forward to a better future. Life is a vast ocean. Being too hard on yourself will only plunge you into deeper pain.
Learn to let go, don’t sweat the small stuff, and live well in the present. That’s the attitude middle-aged people should have. I really agree with :
Many of the pains of life come from blindly being hard on yourself.
The more you’re hard on yourself, the more life will be hard on you. You’ll be unhappy everywhere you go.
Not being hard on yourself is a form of tolerance and wisdom. Middle-aged people who aren’t hard on themselves can live a more comfortable and enjoyable life.
Middle age is the sedimentation of your youth and the foundation for your future old age. In middle age, you have more burdens on your shoulders, and you need to live with more wisdom and clarity.
The midlife crisis is a shift from the material desires you sought in your youth to an inward search for self-knowledge and self-awareness. Liang Shiqiu once said in “Middle Age”:
The charm of middle age lies in a fairly good understanding of life and yourself, doing what you can do and enjoying what you can enjoy.
When faced with setbacks in life, middle-aged people should be calm and composed, confident and unhurried.
Staying active, maintaining emotional stability, and not being hard on yourself are the best ways for middle-aged people to overcome the crisis.